Im gonna get a little personal today, and speak my mind about something i normally dont talk much about and thats my weight, ive always been a bit over weight, and i have always just been happy with myself i never have been ashamed of it until recently, after having Haydn i kinda let myself go a bit, i was so sick for so long i just gave up on trying to be healthy, well i have recently decided that thats not an option, i want to be alive for my sons life, and i want to be healthy, i wanna be that family that plays football in the front yard and i want my son to be proud of me not ashamed. My problems started early in life when i only had a brother, he took care of me fed me and raised me and i will forever be grateful to him for trying to make my life better than his, but his metabolism and mine were too different stories so when we lived off of hamburger helper and mac and cheese it caught up to me much more than him anyhow thats just the beginning and i want this to be the end of this never ending battle, i wish i could find a little bit more motivation through out the day, so i started taking vitamin b12 which is the natural vitamin for energy and metabolism today is the first day and i feel pretty good i hoping that this is something i can continue along with walking everyday i have been walking everyother day or every 2 days but i think that i am strong enough to keep myself going every day instead of taking breaks, i have also slowly started your fitness for the xbox kinex, and i think once the water temp warms up when james is at work i am going to start swimming the lake, i hear swimming is an awesome activity and i enjoy it.
Today i am ending this craziness my family and my baby deserve better from me starting today i am going to try much hard than i have been, being a mom has definitly caught up with me i have become a person i dont like and i am hoping to change that very soon i want to be happy again!!
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